danceswithfaeries's Xanga

Tuesday, August 31, 2004

Tue, 31 Aug 2004 17:20:05 GMT

I've been lusting after this certain BBQ place for the longest time, and I finally got to eat there for lunch today. I just want to say that I am in lurve and will never again eat anyone else's BBQ. I must stay true to my new luv. It was wonderful!!! And... as if that wasn't enough... I stopped into the new coffee/juice bar and grabbed a double chocolate frapp. Heavenly! I have a piece of caramel-pecan cheesecake in the refrig for later. Mmmmm....

I got all my business calls done this afternoon, so I am free to goof off for a few hours. Putting together a media kit is more costly than I would have imagined, but I think the benefits will outweigh the cost. The most expensive things are the photographs and the folders. I'm already thinking of ways I can cut corners when I put my own media kit together.

Went in There last night. Ema and I went in at the same time and were shocked to see an old friend of ours log in, as well. So, the three of us goofed off, and it felt wonderful to laugh with them again.

I feel like I could conquer the world... how many shots of espresso did they put in that drink?!?!

Monday, August 30, 2004

Mon, 30 Aug 2004 16:29:57 GMT

I've been up trying to do some work for my current client. Lucky for everyone involved I do have coffee this morning. The weather agrees with me, as well. It's overcast and rainy... the type of day I enjoy. Just a little bit more to do work-wise and a break is on the schedule.

I spent 3 hours the other night getting my planner in order, and it still doesn't look the way I would like for it to look. The thing is, I need some customized sheets. If I could learn to manipulate the Word or Works program into creating these pages I would be happy, but creating things like that is not my strong point. Basically the pages have to be half-sheet sized, and I am not sure how to accomplish this with the information I wish to include. I've never been skilled at making forms and such.

Watched the Mtv VMA's last night with my kids and Wolf. Let me just ponder aloud... when did there get to be such an inbalance in the musical representation on Mtv? Where were the rock groups and rock videos? I enjoy all kinds of music (much to the dismay of some people), but I like variety and balance. The saving graces were... Alicia Keys won the best R&B Video award, and rightly so. She was the only nominee who sings actual R&B. There were a few great perfomances... Alicia Keys and Stevie Wonder with Lenny Kravitz, Christina Aguilera and Nelly did a very cool 20's skit/song, and Outkast ended up the night with some of their songs (though I thought they looked bored at some points). At one point, they had the President's daughters and John Kerry's daughters come out to talk about voting, and I was aggravated by the immaturity that was showed when people began to "boo" the girls. Maroon 5 won an award, but they were not there to get it.. drats! And, Linkin Park won the Viewers Choice award... YAY!

Well... back to work...

Wednesday, August 25, 2004

Wed, 25 Aug 2004 23:24:52 GMT

Oh, the joys of motherhood. I knew it would happen sooner or later... my son getting into a disagreement with the neighborhood boys. After hearing everyone's story this is what I got... they were all out playing with their water guns and such when one boy decided it would be cool to jump on my son (his back) and not let go. This enraged my son, especially when another boy there grabbed his prized toy sword and ran with it. When my son finally got loose from the other boy's death grip, he chased the other child and got his sword back and proceeded to come back home. He was furious because the one child had jumped on him and the other child (who he thought was his friend) betrayed his trust and stole his sword and then tried to chase him (after he retrieved his sword) while the other child yelled for him to hit my son. As he was coming into the house he screamed to the offending child with some bad language. I was upset enough about the cursing. Period. But when I found out that one of his curse words was based on the other child's race *I* was the one furious.

What distrubed me, as well, was my son's rage. He was furious, and I believe in my heart that if he could have physically hurt those children he might have done so. He could barely answer my questions, doing so through clinched teeth. His eyes were filled with hate like I have never seen in someone his age. He clinched and unclinched his fist as we talked. I know that he was under the influence of some powerful chemicals in his body from the fued, but I was just not prepared to see one of my children in this state.

I stood there while he apologized to the child he cursed at, sending away several other children who had gathered for the show. The other child, who started it all, never came over and seemed oblivious to all the trouble he had started.

After talking to my son I decided we needed to make some changes. Of course, he is being punished (grounded from going outside and playing on the computer), but I saw in him something that made me pause. I saw a child who can not handle his emotions well enough to play some of the games I've allowed into his possession. I made him bring me his PS2 games. I went through them and removed all the games rated T or M except for one T rated game that involves skateboarding. He will no longer be allowed to play those games or any other violent game (or game with excessive adult language). Don't get me wrong... I am not blaming the games for his behavior, not in the least... what I am saying is that he obviously does not know how to deal with the emotions and situations that those games represent. He is 10 years old, and there is a reason those games were rated M. I am only sorry that it took this to make me pay attention to what was going into his head and heart.

*sigh*

Wednesday, August 25, 2004

Wed, 25 Aug 2004 21:37:26 GMT

Feeling cranky for no good reason. My reclusive nature is rearing its ugly head.

I drove by a small house today and thought about how wonderful it will be to live in such a place one day... with my own parking space even. I considered that it would suit me just fine to stay in the house most of the time, shopping online and such. Heck, wouldn't need much then, I suppose.

Nothing is wrong.

Talked to someone about doing a possible article on one of my favorite subjects... vampires. Did some research afterward that was interesting. I will most likely spend more time looking into the vampire world I know is out there... see what I can unearth.

I need an obsession...

Tuesday, August 24, 2004

Tue, 24 Aug 2004 02:18:52 GMT

As much as I wanted to see my daughter, I am pleased to say that BAW called a few minutes ago and told me they wouldn't be comng this weekend. My anxiety level just dropped an amazing amount, and I may actually get to sleep tonight!

Of course, you know I have to report the odd with the good. She asked me if A**wipe could talk to the children, then she proceeds to connect with him via 3 way call so that *she* is on the calls with the children and him. I swear, she had some nerve to call *me* controlling one time. Now my children can't even have a simple phone conversation with their father without her input?

I got to speak to Nicole... she had a physical today and had to get a tetnus shot. Tomorrow she is going to the dentist for an appointment about getting braces. They are going to make her an appointment to see if there is anything that can be done about the mobility in her arm (birth injury). I'm happy she is being taken care of, but it almost feels like slap in the face. Maybe I am carrying some guilt because I didn't do those things for her when she was here... braces and such. It's unsettling at any rate.

Monday, August 23, 2004

Mon, 23 Aug 2004 19:46:33 GMT

Yes, they call it Progressive, but I could think of other names more suited. I had Geico car insurance for the longest time, but when I got the Mercury I decided to try Progressive because they always claimed to be so much cheaper. The rate was great, so I signed on for the 6 months. In the last 2 weeks my premium has increased over 200 dollars from the original quoted premium. I was furious when I got the 2nd increase in the mail today! I called them and told them they could either get back to my original quote or they could kiss my money good-bye. Within a few minutes Jim (trusty CS rep) lets me know that all I have to do is sign a simple form and the premium will again drop to its original amount. Did they honestly think I would let their increase slide on by without asking questions?

Was up during the night again, even though I took 2 Tylenol PM tablets to knock my butt out. Apparently I need something stronger.

Wolf and I are doing well. I would like to blame my craziness on PMS or some other hormonal thing, but in truth I think it was my own insecurities acting up and making me fearful. Everything was fine (is fine) and will remain fine. I need to stop letting my past create fears in my present and future. Wolf is NOT A**wipe, and I know that he loves me with a depth that I have never experienced before knowing him.

Haven't gotten much in the way of work done today, but there is always the hope of tomorrow.

Sunday, August 22, 2004

Sun, 22 Aug 2004 13:01:58 GMT

I am once again facing the morning with my Irish breakfast tea, but this time I can say I made it from my office. I bopped off yesterday and purchased a small coffee maker for the office. I am such a kid sometimes... I was even excited about buying a small can of coffee and a container of creamer for my office. I guess it's nice to find happiness in the small things. I dug around in my box of things yet unpacked and found a small little tea bag dish I've had for years. I do believe that I will eventually get a small refrigerator for the office to hold cold drinks.

I need to get to work on the media kit I've been hired to put together. I've done some initial research on the things that need to be done, but I haven't written any of her bio yet. I think I'll send her an e-mail tomorrow morning and let her know about the things she is going to need to fill the package. I can take care of getting these things for her, or she may want to purchase them herself.

I would like to find a place to sell my Egyptian articles as reprints. I put a lot of work into those articles, and there is no need for them to sit around collecting dust. Of course, that can be said about most of the articles I have sitting behind protective plastic in my big binder.

I'm thinking about trying Weight Watchers again. I did have some success with it when I was using it two years ago. Would be a nice way to meet new people, as well.

Dropped by the Goodwill store yesterday and found a Rubix cube for 50 cents. Yes, I bought the toy. I couldn't help myself. It was screaming at me from the past. I remember solving a cube once when I was a teenager, but I never managed to do it twice.

Another thing on the to-do list this week is to check into pen pal publications and see which ones are still up and running. I want to secure some new friends to correspond with, and I know those publications will be the best way to connect with others looking to do the same.

I had an awful time sleeping last night. I was up and down all night because of some concerns I have over the way Wolf handled his free time yesterday. I felt pushed aside. At one point he was standing near me and actually acted hurried, like he couldn't wait to return to his gaming. My feelings were hurt. Wolf and I have never had any problems like this, so it took me by surprise. I've had a tough time sorting it all out in my head. I'm trying to be logical about things, but my emotions are screaming for equal time.

The sun is shining today. I think I'll open the blind in the office here and enjoy some quiet time.

Saturday, August 21, 2004

Sat, 21 Aug 2004 14:15:44 GMT

Sitting here with my Irish breakfast tea and a bagel, wondering about the weekend. Wolf is off today and tomorrow, so the family is home together for a change. It's a rainy day, and this makes me want to stay in my pjs all day and play games and watch movies. I have tons of things I could be doing... laundry, query writing, market research.... ah, what the heck, I think I will just enjoy this weekend as a freedom.

I need to purchase a tea pot and serving tray that will allow me to bring tea into my office without fear of dropping things as I climb the stairs. I have 4 cups and saucers that were made in Ireland, and they are my little treasures. I would like to get a tea pot to match them, but if not something plain would be fine. I supose that I could set up a tea center up here in my office.... not a bad idea. Oh sure... and the next thing I will be wanting is a mini 'fridge. I might never leave the office if I get those things.

Autumn is just around the corner and already I can feel my energy shifting. Autumn frees me, much like Spring does for some people. I long for the cool days and nights, the changing leaves and the relaxed mood of the season. I can feel it is almost here... wonderful.